When I Call Your Name
by Nomi's Secret
Summary: After Cas saves the brothers from an onslaught they drag his body back to the motel room. Dean realizes he feels more than guilt at the angel's passing. Oneshot. Destiel.


**When I Call Your Name…**

_Hey! My first Destiel one shot. From my DeviantArt account. The prompt words were simply Destiel and Rain. Given by ParaCaerOuVoar. Enjoy! XD_

Dean stared out of the dreary motel room to an even drearier scene outside. Ever since that damn angel had gotten himself killed all it had done was rain. Pitter patter, pitter patter. That's all Dean heard now.

His fingers parted the cheap plastic venetian blinds so he could see the parking lot. It was starting to get flooded. Puddles were slowly merging together to form a reservoir of rain water. It was only a few inches away from the Impala's rear wheel but at the moment Dean couldn't even force himself to care.

He felt exactly like the weather. Sad and distant. He didn't even understand why. Sure Castiel had been a friend and he had died trying to save him and Sammy from a hoard of demons. All of a sudden the angels appear and boom. A flash of light and he's gone. For good. This feeling was more than feeling guilty for his death. It felt like a part of him had died in that flash of light. He felt lost and alone. His last hope had been extinguished.

He drank from the bottle of beer he had in his other hand and rubbed the bridge of his nose. He hadn't slept in over forty eight hours, he hadn't even tried to sleep. Just in case he came back. He wasn't coming back though and Dean knew it. He didn't want to admit it though.

He'd never classed himself as gay because he had never been attracted to a dude before but the way that Cas spoke, the way he appeared and disappeared and those eyes. Those crystal clear mesmerizing blue eyes. He bit his lower lip. The thought of never seeing those eyes again was enough for him to tear up. There was a sound from within the bathroom and he barely acknowledged it.

Sam sighed and he came out of the bathroom with wet hair and wearing fresh clothes, "I'm err…Dean are you okay?"

He rubbed his eyes and turned his face away from his brother, "yeah, I'm fine"

It was obvious he wasn't but he didn't need his baby brother to start looking out for him. That was his job and it always had been ever since Sammy was born.

"Right" he sounded skeptical, "I'm gonna go check out a safe place for erm…"

His voice drifted off and his eyes looked over to one of the single beds. Dean twisted his head and saw the shape underneath the sheets. His heart wrenched as he remembered what happened.

After they killed him and the demons disappeared Zachariah tried one of his little tricks to get Dean to say yes. Causing Sam lung cancer, breaking his spine in four different places and finally giving a brain tumor but none of it made any difference. He'd hold out. At least long enough to give his friend a funeral.

They used the sigil to send them all away when they had the chance and then the two brothers carried his body to the Impala and laid Cas down in the back seat. Sam wanted to cremate him right there but Dean wouldn't allow it. They drove all night until they found a motel then they had laid his body down in one of the beds. Dean couldn't stand looking at him after the first few hours. Cas looked like he was sleeping peacefully and he kept thinking that maybe he'd wake up. That it had all been a bad dream. The angry red mark on his neck said otherwise though. It went straight through. It went through skin, tissue, arteries, cartilage, bone and brain stem. So finally he used the sheets to cover him up.

Sam sighed, "I better get going"

He grabbed his coat and made for the door. Dean stayed where he was and watched him silently pull his collar up against the weather and walk in the opposite direction as the town. It wasn't long before it was impossible to see Sam in between the drops of water being thrown down from the sky. He set his beer down and went into the bathroom.

He looked at himself in the mirror. He looked like shit. His hair was flat and messy, he had black bags under his eyes proof that he hadn't slept and he had a cut on his jaw that was going to scar. Sam still wanted to stitch it up.

He sighed heavily and turned the cold water on. He splashed his face several times and wondered about what could have been. He wondered whether Cas had felt the same way and whether anything would've happened between them.

He put his head down and looked down the drain of the sink. It was a bottomless pit from what he could see. He realized he also felt like that inside too. He was beginning to wonder if there was anything he didn't feel like. Happy sprung to mind.

Dean closed his eyes and a tear fell from his eye. He heard the tell tale fluttering of wings. He swung around with his knife in his hand ready to fight whatever mofo heaven could throw at him. But there was no one there. He gulped and resigned he must be going crazy.

Then almost by his ear he heard his name whispered, "Dean"

His eyes widened and he spun round again. Still nothing.

"Cas?" he asked warily, "Cas?"

His voice was almost shaking with emotion. No way could it have been him. It wasn't possible. He was dead. He was lying on the damn bed!

Dean stepped out into the room. He was on the bed right? The sheets were ruffled and there was no bump or shape under them anymore.

He scowled. The damn angels had stolen Cas's body! That was a new freakin low, even for them. He grabbed his shotgun from out of the duffle bag and went storming out into the parking lot. The door was already open and blowing in the wind. There was already a puddle forming in the doorway.

Dean went and stood in the middle of the parking lot. It was empty. Everyone was avoiding the bad weather and staying inside till it passed over. He turned around with a desperate look on his face and screamed up to the heavens.

"I'm here you goddam sonofabitch! What else are you gonna fucking do huh? I'm right here, you just come and take me you bastards! You've fucking taken his life! Isn't that enough! Why the hell do you want to take his body too!" He took a deep breath, "you give me Cas back! I swear down you'll regret this!" he whispered, "come back Cas…please"

He hung his head low and let the cool rain hit the back of his neck. Its pit patter made him calmer as it ran down his back. He heard the flutter behind him. It was louder this time.

"Whatever you want just take it…I don't care anymore" he said quietly.

He heard footsteps walk around him. He saw their shoes. Why the hell did they all wear office clothes? A hand reached up just under his chin and lifted his face so he could see who it was.

Dean couldn't believe it.

The angel leaned in and their lips met. Dean was happy, happier than anything. He parted his lips and kissed back.

"Cas" Dean breathed heavily. He realized he was crying, "you're alive"


End file.
